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Saturday, May 8, 2010

seed's a sprouting





Took a few hour drive to Rocky Mount, NC, Art Center today. It was 93’ in the Piedmont. The Art Center is a brick, reconstructed tobacco factory from the 1800’s. Took in an exhibit of the printmaker/painter Keiji Shinohara. His choice of colors mortised with blacks and greys really inspired me to do more with what I did with http://greenartstudio.com/intowaves16.html. On the drive home Jane told me by cell about this tomato she sliced open sprouting on the inside. An idea that will come to fruition. It was still 93’ after I passed through Jacksonville and suddenly within a mile it dropped down to 72’. A bit breezy but a whole lot more comfortable. 

Thursday, May 6, 2010

A Look at Toxicity in Visual Arts Materials (revised version, New and Improved!))

   Three Skulls                                                    © Patch


Have revised my older version that will be published in The Center for Sustainable Practice in the Arts Quarterly. www.sustainablepractice.org/ The article will appear just as new legislation is being proposed to Congress to create stronger regulations and inspections on manufacturers of all products that contain materials that recent science has proven negative health effects from chemicals presently being used in all, not just art, manufacturing. The bill asks for further studies on those chemicals that have not been researched thoroughly, or at all, that are being used in manufacturing presently. Have just sent an email to Congress and to my NC State Senators and Representives asking them for their support in passing the new legislation of the Safe Chemicals Act of 2010 along with my article. The Safe Chemicals Act would go a long way to bring federal safe chemicals policy into the 21st century and to reduce a significant threat to American's health and environment from toxic chemicals. Please let your Members of Congress know that we have a once-in-a-generation opportunity to get this legislation right. To stay on top of the issue visit the Safer Chemicals, Healthy Families coalition at www.saferchemicals.org.

A Look at Toxicity in Visual Arts Materials
© Greg Patch 2010

The environmental and/or health effects of visual art mediums are a subject not on the forefront of the public’s mind. Perhaps, in part, lured by intoxicating art materials and imagery we don’t perceive the dangers inherent in the materials used to create them. Some of the responsibility for its’ hidden aspects is with those bodies funding the visual arts. Many are petroleum (Mobil-Exxon and Getty), chemical (Dow) and governmental sources. (Art and Creative Materials Institute [ACMI] and the NEA)

The group Art and Creative Materials Institute (ACMI) is a non-profit trade certifying association of manufacturers of art materials in the U.S. They are responsible for labeling and monitoring art paints and materials for their safety. Simply, they are largely sponsored by "in house" industrial representatives.

Most art material manufacturing companies provide MSDS's on their websites. It ‘s revealing to go to the manufacturer websites of visual arts supplies and read through their safety data sheets. As one example the following is quoted from Windsor Newton’s site on the commonly used Flake White oil paint:

“USAGE PRECAUTIONS: Avoid spilling, skin and eye contact. Wear full protective clothing for prolonged exposure and/or high concentrations. Pregnant or breast feeding women must not handle this product.
STORAGE PRECAUTIONS: Keep in cool, dry, ventilated storage and closed containers.
STORAGE CRITERIA: Misc. hazardous material storage.
INHALATION: Harmful by inhalation. Harmful: danger of serious damage to health by prolonged exposure through inhalation.
INGESTION: Harmful if swallowed. Harmful: possible risk of irreversible effects if swallowed.
SKIN: Product has a defatting effect on skin.
EYES: Irritating to eyes.
HEALTH WARNINGS: Swallowing concentrated chemical may cause severe internal injury.
OTHER HEALTH EFFECTS: Toxic to Reproductive Health Cater. 1. Toxic to Reproductive Health Cater. 3. Carcinogen Category 3.
ROUTE OF ENTRY: Inhalation. Ingestion.” [skin absorption.]
MEDICAL SYMPTOMS: Upper respiratory irritation. Nausea, vomiting. Allergic rash.
MEDICAL CONSIDERATIONS: Skin disorders and allergies.”

Not to single out Windsor & Newton nor Flake White more information on toxicity in oil, acrylic, watercolor, etc. paints can be found by requesting a Material Data Safety Sheet (MSDS) from individual manufacturers. They are by law to be readily available to the public. Some are, others, like Crayola require jumping though hoops to acquire. Here are a few links to some of the larger manufacturer’s MSDS that are easily accessible:
Utrecht  http://www.utrechtart.com/MSDS/
Rembrandt  http://www.winsornewton.com/resource-centre/health-safety-data-information/
Liquitex:  http://www.liquitex.com/health safety/msds.cfm
Holbein: http://www.holbeinhk.com/healthnsafety.html
Windsor Newton:  http://www.winsornewton.com/resource-centre/health-safety-data-information/

Contacting Grumbacher (Chartpak) by email, I received instructions to navigate their website to get individual color. With Alizirin Crimson the warning; “This product contains lead, a chemical known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm.” with no first aid suggestions listed.

The cobalt, chrome, manganese and barium colors are toxic as are most commercial terpentine, fixative, varnish, plastic/acrylic, and preservative, ie. formaldehyde. Many manufacturers and retailers use the term organic in describing their art products based on that they are derived from an organic compound. This is not the typical garden variety organic. Arsenic, lead and cyanide are organic compounds. 

Some of the more common colors from the City of Tucson, AZ Environmental Services Department’s website http://www.ci.tucson.az.us/art hazards/paint1.html that have hazardous warnings (keep in mind that materials exposed to the skin are ingested):

- Manganese Blue; ingestion and inhalation is categorised as possibly highly toxic.
- Prussian Blue is moderately toxic when ingested and produces extremely toxic hydrogen cyanide gas if heated or treated with acid or ultraviolet radiation.
-Burnt Umber is moderately toxic when ingested and possibly highly toxic when inhaled.
- Chrome Green is Highly toxic if ingested and extremely toxic when inhaled. It is a known carcinogen; DO NOT USE.
- Cadmium Barium Orange and Cadmium Orange are both highly toxic when inhaled and are probable carcinogens
- Alizarin Crimson may cause some allergies
- Cadmium Red is highly toxic when inhaled and slightly toxic when ingested. It is a probable carcinogen.
- Vermillion is extremely toxic when ingested and highly toxic when inhaled, it can cause skin allergies and it forms hydrogen sulfide in combination with stomach acid; most vermilion today is a mixture of less toxic organic pigments.
- Cobalt Violet is highly toxic ingested or inhaled.
- Cadmium Yellow is a possible chronic hazard and a probable carcinogen.

Many colors on their website are listed as having no significant hazards, some colors are listed as having unknown effects and that long-term hazards are unknown.

Health conditions from skin rash and burning eyes to cancers, respiratory, immunological, nervous, cardiovascular and circulatory, genitary and digestive diseases could be sourced to using these materials. There needs to be more funding to exploring these possibilities. With the warning of not to be used by pregnant and nursing mothers the question arises; at what level is this warned toxicity effecting the rest of us and domestic and wildlife?

Listed below are a group of pigments that have “no significant hazards”. These also are provided by the City of Tucson, AZ and Their Environmental Services Department “Health & Safety in the Arts, A  Searchable Database of Health & Safety Information for Artists” website.

Charcoal Black
Bone Black
Graphite Black/Stove Black Pigment Black #10
Mars Black
Phthalocyanine Blue
Ultramarine Blue
Burnt Sienna
Sepia
Van Dyke Brown
Green Earth #23
Phthalocyanine Green
Ultramarine Green #24
Mars Orange Pigment Red #101
Indian red (red iron oxide)
Ultramarine Red Pigment Violet #15
Mars Violet Pigment Red #101
Ultramarine Violet Pigment Violet #15
White Pigment White #24
White Pigment White #18
White Pigment White #23
Titanium White White #6
Mars Yellow
Ochre
Raw Sienna
Sienna
Yellow Ochre
Yellow Iron Oxide Pigment Yellow #42, #43
Metallic Gold Pigment Metal #3
Metallic Silver

Artistsfoundation.org has more information on hazards in their Occupational Health Care Hazards for Artists, and take look at Square Feet Chicago's "Safe and Healthy Spaces".

What happens to our environment when a manufacturing plant produces large quantities of paints using toxic materials? The EPA is responsible for this. How is it regulated? I’ve written and called the EPA in the past for any information they could send me and have not received any response.  Perhaps if more write and call the Environmental Protection Agency and ask them what there regulations are and how are they regulating and enforcing the industries more accountability will be made available.
Environmental Protection Agency
Ariel Rios Building
1200 Pennsylvania Avenue, N.W.
Washington, DC 20460
(202) 272-0167
TTY (speech- and hearing-impaired) (202) 272-0165

How many artists, art students, children, pregnant and nursing mothers and hobbyists are using the necessary precautions when handling the materials; ventilation. ventilators, effective masks, gloves, long sleave shirts, etc.? Once the painting is finished and placed in the living room, kitchen, cafe, outdoor public facility, gallery or museum, what is the air  and ground quality produced by VOCs/off gases and the toxic pigments themselves, immediate and accumulative?

Sustainable solutions are at our fingertips. A look at the alternatives with painting mediums that do not create a toxic body or environment shows egg tempera, casein (for the lactose intolerant casein is milk based), water, beeswax mediums and organic linseed and flax oils. Each, or a combination of these can be used without toxic pigments, petrochemicals (petroleum based varnishes, acrylics, fixatives), heavy metals (cadmium, barium, etc.), formaldehyde and other preservatives that are in common use with many paints.

There are many books and websites with recipes for making oil, watercolor, casein, egg tempera and beeswax or encaustic paints. Using pigments with no significant hazards, natural resins, varnishes and etc. in these recipes is not difficult. It adds even more integrity to the essence of the work!

A good recipe for making or manufacturing a relatively safe oil paint can be found at The Earth Pigments Company (nci) website.
http://www.earthpigments.com/art/artists-oil-paints.cfm#basic
The Earth Pigments Company also offers a recipe for egg tempera at http://www.earthpigments.com/art/artists-egg-tempera.cfm. For casein (milk base) http://www.earthpigments.com/art/artists-casein.cfm, for watercolor and gouache http://www.earthpigments.com/art/artists-casein.cfm, and for encaustic (beeswax) http://www.earthpigments.com/art/artists-encaustic.cfm.
There are other sources for paint recipes, Ralph Mayer’s “Artist Handbook of Materials and Techniques” is an old standard. 

Sculptors can work with clay/earth/stone, wood, metal, fire, water, air and/or ether to create work used in an environmental and personal healthy considerate way.

True sustainability is in question with our using toxic recyclables, ie., automobile tires, plastics/pcb based, acrylics, polyvinyls, concrete, etc. and certain metals to create art. Is the idea of keeping and working with these materials justifiable in creating a cleaner environment and healthy populations of humans and wildlife? Is creating works of art with toxic materials to make a statement about the condition of the declining environment practical and sensible? Are sources for sustainable art supplies a personal objective determined on how sustainable one can integrate our lives, or is there such a thing as purity regarding non hazardous materials?

There’s been exciting activity in the last 30 or more years with artists applying the natural world to create artistic statements. Websites to view what is going on in environmental art, sustainable art and green art with many artists and healthy approaches as examples are: 
Center for Sustainable Practice in the Arts - www.sustainablepractice.org/ 
ecoartspace - http://www.ecoartspace.org/
Green Arts Web -http://www.greenarts.org/ 
greenmuseum.org - http://www.greenmuseum.org/
Morning Earth - http://www.morning-earth.org

I have used beeswax alone on Phragmites australis, an “invasive” grass, panels I constructed and beeswax with various colored “dirt” (ochres and granites). A crayon of beeswax and natural pigment has been a favorite of mine for years that is manufactured by the Stockmar Company (nci) in Germany. These waxes/crayons are color fast (the colors are tested to last 100 years), the carefully selected pigments are food container safe. They can be used room temperature or heated to liquid. This form of painting/drawing is free of turpentine, processed oils, petrochemicals/plastics, or, any toxic metals/chemicals. My next phase will be mixing some of the previous mentioned pigments with beeswax. I prefer to use only pigment and beeswax without hardeners as part of my statement with my artwork. I consider this to be speaking to the process symbolising the transience of life and the ideal of non attachment to the material world similar to ideas expressed in Buddhist, Native American, Australian Aborigine and other traditional world cultures’ sand painting.
Check out what I’m up to at www.greenartstudio.com and www.gregpatch.blogspot.com.


Wednesday, May 5, 2010

S.C.R.E.A.M. INC

Have just registered ten works to the S.C.R.E.A.M. INC website for participation in their art project. The works can also be seen in my Facebook photo album; http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2062342&id=1381040993





Description
S.C.R.E.A.M. iNC. has just launched an online concept gallery that offers collectors and artists financial transparency within a logical pricing framework and reports the results in an 'Index' format. 

S.C.R.E.A.M. iNC.
Spontaneous 
Creativity 
Rapidly 
Expands 
Art 
Market

All works listed in the Gallery Index will be offered at one of three price ranges in a hybrid retail-auction system developed by S.C.R.E.A.M. iNC.

$ 500 - $ 1,000
                                                     $ 2,500 - $ 5,000
                                                     $ 5,000 - $ 10,000

Through the duration of this event artists will receive 80% of the final bid amount.

Artists that sell at least one work of art within this period, which is also successfully delivered to the client, will be 'locked' in at the current percentage rate of 80%.

All works must be shipped to client by artist. Artist will receive 50% payment before shipping work and the balance after delivery to client.

Scenarios : 

Art the artist has 3 paintings hanging in the neighborhood cafe and several more in her studio that she would like to show. She excitedly decides to apply to S.C.R.E.A.M. iNC. with the following paintings:

3 medium @ 5,000 = $ 15,000
2 large @ 10,000 = $ 20,000
5 small @ 1,000 = $ 5,000 ( 3 from cafe)

10 Works of Art 
High Market Value $ 40,000
Min. Market Value $ 20,000

Scenario A: Catherine the collector decides she likes Art's work and calls SCREAM iNC.to place a bid. She puts a $2,500 dollar bid on a medium painting and buys one of the smaller pieces outright. The smaller painting is shipped to her right away and if she is not out-bid by the end of the modeling period she will win the medium sized painting.

Scenario B: Carl the collector sees a few paintings he likes and doesn't want to take the chance of being out bid so he visits www.screaminc.net and buys the work online and pays full price. When the sale is validated and monies received the artist will be paid 50% of the final price and the balance after successful delivery to the client.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Cultivating Openness When Things Fall Apart

Being a reader of brief accounts I read Pema Chödrön Awakening Loving-Kindness (abridged version of The Wisdom of No Escape) and other short articles by and of her and find that her writing addresses universal understandings. Below is a brief biography from Wikipedia and an interview with her by bell hooks and Shambhala Sun.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pema_Chödrön



Pema Chödrön was born in or around 1936 in New York City. She attended Miss Porters School in Farmington, Connecticut and graduated from the University of California, Berkeley. She worked as an elementary school teacher in California and New Mexico before her conversion to Buddhism.
Following a second divorce, Chödrön began to study with Lama Chime Rinpoche in the French Alps. She became a Buddhist nun in 1974 while studying with him in London.[2]She is a fully-ordained bhikṣuṇī in a combination of the Mulasarvastivadin and Dharmaguptaka lineages of vinaya, having received full ordination in Hong Kong in 1981 at the behest of the sixteenth Karmapa. She has been instrumental in trying to reestablish full ordination for nuns in the Mulasarvastivadin order, to which all Tibetan Buddhist monastics have traditionally belonged; various conferences have been convened to study the matter.
Ani Pema first met Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche in 1972, and at the urging of Chime Rinpoche, she took him as her root guru ("Ani" is a Tibetan honorific for a nun). She studied with him from 1974 until his death in 1987.[3][4] Trungpa Rinpoche's son, Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, appointed Chödrön an acharya (senior teacher) shortly after assuming leadership of his father's Shambhala lineage in 1992.
Trungpa Rinpoche appointed Ani Pema director of the Boulder Shambhala Center (then Boulder Dharmadhatu) in Colorado in the early 1980s.[5] It was during this period that she became ill with chronic fatigue syndrome. In 1984, Ani Pema moved to Gampo Abbey and became its director in 1986.[1] There, she published her first two books to widespread critical acclaim. Her health gradually improved, she claims, with the help of a homeopath and careful attention to diet.
Her books include:
  • The Wisdom of No Escape (1991) (ISBN 1-57062-872-6)
  • Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living (1994) (ISBN 0-87773-880-7)
  • Practicing Peace in Times of War: A Buddhist Perspective (September 2006) (ISBN 1-590-30401-2)
  • Awakening Loving-Kindness (abridged version of The Wisdom of No Escape) (1996) (ISBN 1-570-62259-0)
  • When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (1996) (ISBN 1-570-62969-2)
  • Tonglen: The Path of Transformation (2001) (ISBN 1-570-62409-7)
  • The Places that Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times (2002) (ISBN 1570624097)
  • The Compassion Box - includes Start Where You Are, a set of 59 slogan cards with brief commentaries, and a CD of tonglen meditation instruction (2003)
  • Comfortable with Uncertainty: 108 Teachings on Cultivating Fearlessness and Compassion (ISBN 1-59030-078-5)
  • No Time to Lose: A Timely Guide to the Way of the Bodhisattva (2005) (ISBN 1-590-30135-8)
Her audio recordings include:
  • Awakening Compassion
  • Noble Heart
  • Good Medicine
  • Alice Walker and Pema Chōdrōn in Conversation
  • Pure Meditation
  • Getting Unstuck
  • Seven Points of Mind Training: Shenpa Teachings
  • Don't Bite the Hook
  • How to Meditate


http://www.shambhalasun.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=2043&Itemid=0

Cultivating Openness When Things Fall Apart  

Pema Chödrön & bell hooks talk over life and all its problems
"Isn't that the kind of teaching we need these days, that difficult circumstances can be the path to liberation. That's news you can use."

Initially when I enter the classroom, I share with my students that we are there to think critically—to engage the world we live in—the world of ideas, fully, deeply, with our whole heart. Pema Chödrön's work gives me this gift. Consistently she challenges me to think beyond someplace where I have erected boundaries—where I've allowed myself to become stuck-attached-full of defences.

When I first read her, the writing irked me. I was disturbed by what I began to call its "strategic open-endedness." I wanted to be offered solutions, ways out. Instead, she kept extending an invitation to me and everyone to move into that enchanted space beyond right or wrong—to journey to the heart of compassion. And when you have stepped out on faith, straight into the heart of the matter, loving kindness appears less like a utopian dream. It becomes concrete—a place to practice wherever you are. Beyond the challenges she makes to the stuck places within us, Pema is most seductive and exciting when she urges us to revise our notions of safety, telling us: "Real safety is your willingness to not run away from yourself." She urges us to risk, to embrace rebellion, disruption, and chaos as a beloved site for transformation. Talking with her enabled me to bring issues that trouble my heart out in the open. My hope was that she could and would shed light on the matter. Those bits of light are here in our dialogue. May their radiance reach you.

-bell hooks

bell hooks: Pema, one of the ideas in your work that really challenges me is abandoning the hope of fruition. That's really hard for me.

Pema Chödrön: The way I understand it is that we rob ourselves of being in the present by always thinking that the payoff will happen in the future. The only place ever to work is right now. We work with the present situation rather than a hypothetical possibility of what could be. I like any teaching that encourages us to be with ourselves and our situation as it is without looking for alternatives. The source of all wakefulness, the source of all kindness and compassion, the source of all wisdom, is in each second of time. Anything that has us looking ahead is missing the point.

bell hooks: Much of the work I do revolves around racism and sexism, and on one hand, I want to start right where I am in the now. But on the other hand, I also have to have this vision of a future where these things are not in our lives. Do you think that's too utopian?

Pema Chödrön: Personally, I work with aspiration. The classic aspiration is "Sentient beings are numberless. I vow to save them." That means that I aspire to end suffering for all creatures, but at the same time I stay with the immediacy of the situation I'm in. I give up both the hope that something is going to change and the fear that it isn't. We may long to end suffering but somehow it paralyzes us if we're too goal-oriented. Do you see the balance there? It's like the teaching that Don Juan gave to Carlos Castenada, where he says that you do everything with your whole heart, as if nothing else matters. You do it impeccably and with your whole heart, but all the while knowing that it actually doesn't matter at all.

bell hooks: Yet it seems very hard for people to fight this racism and sexism without hope for an end to it. There is so much despair and apathy because of the feeling that we've struggled and struggled and not enough has changed.

Pema Chödrön: The main issue is aggression. Often if there's too much hope you begin to have a strong sense of enemy. Then the whole process of trying to alleviate suffering actually adds more suffering because of your aggression toward the oppressor. Don't you see a lot of people who have such good intentions but they get very angry, depressed, resentful?

bell hooks: Yes, you're talking to one! I get so overwhelmed sometimes.

Pema Chödrön: Well, doesn't that get in the way?

bell hooks: Yeah, it does. I'm on tour right now talking about my book about ending racism, and I hear people say things like, racism doesn't exist, or, don't you think we've already dealt with that? And I start to feel irritable. This irritability starts mounting in me, and I notice how it collapses into sorrow. I came home the other day and I sat down at my table and just wept because I thought, it's just too much.

Pema Chödrön: Well, isn't that the point? That other people and ourselves, we're the same really, and we just get stuck in different ways. Getting stuck in any kind of self-and-other tension seems to cause pain. So if you can keep your heart and your mind open to those people, in other words, work with any tendency to close down towards them, isn't that the way the system of racism and cruelty starts to de-escalate?

The thing is, once we get into this kind of work we are opening ourselves for all our own unresolved misery to come floating right up and block our compassion. It's a difficult and challenging practice to keep your heart and mind open. It takes a lot to be a living example of unbiased mind! But when you see, bell, how you feel towards these people, you can begin to understand why there is racism, why there is cruelty, because everyone has those same thoughts and emotions that you do. Everyone feels that irritability and then it escalates.

bell hooks: Is it simply a choice of will to have an open heart?

Pema Chödrön: I think it begins with the aspiration to connect with open heart, the knowledge that cultivating openness is how you want to spend the remaining moments of your life.

Openness actually starts to emerge when you see how you close down. You see how you close down, how you yell at someone, and you begin to have some compassion. It starts with compassion towards yourself and then you begin to extend that warmth to the rest of humanity. It begins to dawn on you how it could happen that people are yelling at others because they're oriental or black or hispanic or women or gay or whatever. You begin to know what it's like to stand in their shoes.

bell hooks: How do you develop compassion towards yourself?

Pema Chödrön: A big part of compassion is being honest with yourself, not shielding yourself from your mistakes as if nothing had happened. And the other big component is being gentle.

This is what meditation is about, but obviously it goes beyond sitting on a meditation cushion. You begin to see your moods and your attitudes and your opinions. You begin to hear this voice, your voice, and how it can be so critical of self and others. There is growing clarity about all the different parts of yourself.

Meditation gives you the tools to look at all of this clearly, with an unbiased attitude. A lot of having compassion toward oneself is staying with the initial thought or arising of emotion. This means that when you see yourself being aggressive, or stuck in self-pity, or whatever it might be, then you train again and again in not adding things on top of that—guilt or self-justification or any further negativities. You work on not spinning off and on being kinder toward the human condition as you see it in yourself.

bell hooks: The idea in your work I find so moving is the unconditional embrace of one's being, which allows you to embrace others at the same time. But if I unconditionally accept myself, then what's the motivation to practice further?

Pema Chödrön: That willingness to stick with yourself is just another way of saying that you stay awake. It seems what blocks seeing things truly is our tendency to self-denigrate, to disassociate continually, to edit continually. When you don't close down and shut off, then insight begins to come. This insight is the wisdom that completely cuts through the conventional way of seeing.

So when you see clearly, the motivation to practice becomes stronger and stronger because you begin to have insights that are totally refreshing and powerful. The motivation to practice becomes stronger because you are discovering your true nature and it's painful to block that in any way. It's painful to see yourself being totally neurotic, selfish, all these things, and you can't stand to do that to yourself. You don't want to cover over your openness anymore. Plus you can't bear to see the suffering it causes other people when they do the same thing. 

On one level, our suffering is caused by bigotry and dogmatism and all these things, but ultimately we suffer because we don't understand how limitless we are. You could say that we live in a fantasy, that what we call reality is actually a dream. This is a an important truth—that this whole thing is a fantasy and we're totally completely caught up in it. We limit what is limitless. We condition what is unconditioned, and it makes us miserable. When you begin to understand that, you can't bear for other people to keep hurting themselves that way, and you can't bear to keep hurting yourself that way. Then you are really motivated to practice.

bell hooks: You have commented that we can't smooth out the rough edges, yet as I was listening to you I was thinking, isn't she describing a sense that the rough edges get smoothed out.

Pema Chödrön: No they don't, actually. What you realize is that there's enough space to accommodate all of it. There's enough space in your own being, enough space in the whole of creation, to accommodate all of it. All of it. It's because we pick and choose, because we have biases and prejudices, because we prefer smooth to rough and then react for and against, that we suffer.

bell hooks: Can you talk about the difference between blame and accountability? Because I feel, like you, that blame isn't very useful. But you have said, for instance in reference to men teachers who abuse their powers, that you feel the issue of accountability is real. How does one manoeuvre between giving up blame and being able to embrace the idea of accountability?

Pema Chödrön: This is the message of the first noble truth. You are willing to see suffering as suffering.

Obviously the less that you are caught in your own hope and fear, the more you can just see suffering very straightforwardly and without aggression. So accountability seems to mean you can be honest, incredibly honest. You see that harm is being done. You see someone harming a child, an animal, another human being. You see that clearly and your strongest wish is to de-escalate that suffering. Then the question is, how do you proceed so that the person you see as the problem becomes accountable, becomes willing to acknowledge what they're doing?

You realize how hard it is for you to acknowledge what you are doing in your own life. You see what it takes to become accountable yourself, and you begin to try to find the skillful means to communicate so that the barriers come down rather than get reinforced. It has everything to do with communication: how can you communicate so that someone can hear what you're saying and you can also hear what they are saying?

bell hooks: One of the issues that I've had with the students in my American literature classes is my sense that we're all accountable, that while I as teacher am a certain kind of center from which things radiate, everyone is accountable. They were very distressed last week because I said to them, you know, these papers are really boring. And they came back this week and they said, you were really mean, you were just so raw. And I said, excuse me, was I the only one thinking these papers were boring? Am I the only person who's accountable here?

Although I did not have the pleasure and pain of meeting Trungpa Rinpoche, I've always been moved by his teaching. I have always felt myself to be embodying in my own teaching and habits of being a certain wildness of spirit that's experimental, that's willing to push the boundaries. That's why my book on teaching is called Teaching to Transgress.

Pema Chödrön: Accountability, as you're talking about it, is my understanding of the spiritual path. With Trungpa Rinpoche, my feeling was that all he was doing was getting people to take responsibility for themselves, getting them to grow up. He was a master of not confirming. Talking to him was like talking to a huge space where everything bounced back, and you had to be accountable for yourself.

Personally I feel that the role of the teacher is to wean the students from dependency, and from taking the parent/child view of life altogether. That's what I think of as non-theism. Theism doesn't just have to do with God; it has to do with always feeling that you're incomplete and need something or someone outside to look to. It's like never growing up.

To me, theism is feeling that you can't find out for yourself what's true. You take the Buddhist teachings, or any teachings and you just try to fit yourself into them. But you're not really finding out. You're not grappling with it. You're not really digging into it and letting it transform your being. You are just trying to live up to some ideal. You are still looking for the security of having someone else to praise or blame.

So accountability is pretty groundless. There is no hand to hold. It's like the lojong slogan that says, "Of the two judges, trust the principal one." No matter what other people say, when it really comes down to it, you're the only one who can answer your own questions.

bell hooks: You have taken radically different paths at different moments of your life. I'm interested in how we can use mindfulness as a way of illuminating vocation, of knowing when we need to let one path go and move towards another. Do you still grapple with those questions?

Pema Chödrön: Oh, all the time. I mean, isn't that the way? The more you really get into it, the more you grapple. Life is such a stunner. It's always humbling you and showing you how little you know, how little you understand. It continues to inspire you to go forward, but wow, it's a pretty humbling experience. I don't know if that's really what you mean here.
bell hooks: It's a part of what I mean, but I was asking more concretely how we practice in a manner that illuminates our everyday life choices.

Pema Chödrön: What do you think, bell?

bell hooks: I was thinking about work in America and work as a place of suffering for lots of people. So many people spend their lives working in jobs where they feel miserable and I am certainly one of those who feels somewhat miserable in her own job.
Pema Chödrön: Well, there's always the simple answer of moving into a different field. There's nothing wrong with that. But just changing the outer situation doesn't get at the root of the discontent. This gets down to the truth of suffering again. As human beings, we need to look directly at suffering, at what causes it, at what makes it escalate, and at what allows it to dissolve. So the first thing is to acknowledge, with a lot of honesty and heart, that no matter where we go or what we do, there are always going to be both positive and negative feelings and that this is a fertile situation.

My own experience is that I've been a nun going on twenty-three years or so, and as the years go on my life gets in some ways simpler and clearer. But you know, bell, these feelings of worry, of not enough time, still come up. Then you realize how much of it is in our minds. Whether we're in a totally overwhelming work situation or a very simplified one, we still have to work with our minds.

That's why some teachings say that no matter what is happening in your life, it's always showing you the true nature of reality. No matter what movie you're in, no matter what the plot is of the current film you're starring in, it is the vehicle for showing you the true nature of your mind.   

So I feel the whole thing comes down to being very, very attuned to one's emotions—to seeing how one is attached to the pleasant and has an aversion to what is painful. You work again and again on trying to discover how to get unhooked, to open and soften rather than to tighten and close down. It comes down to realizing the wisdom and compassion that are contained in this life that we have, just as it is. No matter how simplified or complicated life gets, it can make us miserable or it can wake us up.

bell hooks: One of the things I've been thinking about a great deal is poverty. I feel very strongly that in our society people have been made to feel that you can't lead a meaningful life if you are poor. So much of the agitation in the lives of the poor in this society has to do with this disdain.

Pema Chödrön: The question is how to help people, no matter how desperate their lives are, to realize that they are worthy to live on this earth, that they do not have to feel inferior or be ashamed of themselves. And the question is how to help people to get smarter about what causes suffering to increase and what causes it to decrease.

There is a famous saying that from great suffering comes great compassion. Well, from great suffering can come great compassion, or from great suffering can come great hatred. Maybe someone like you could really work on that message right there. From great suffering can come great openness of heart, a great sense of kinship with others, or from great suffering can come hatred, resentment and despair.

bell hooks: But it isn't an automatic thing. It isn't because you suffer that you will have compassion. In the past people have felt that this is some kind of reward for your suffering, that you will have compassion.

Pema Chödrön: People need a lot of support for suffering to turn into compassion. What usually happens to people when they don't have teachers and guides and the support of people who care is that great suffering leads to more suffering. You have mothers who don't have the money to care for their kids and on top of that they get completely lost in drugs, not to mention that their kids are getting into deep trouble. So the nightmare escalates and escalates.

The fundamental question is not whether there is or isn't suffering. It is how we work with suffering so that it leads to awakening the heart and going beyond the habitual views and actions that perpetuate suffering. How do we actually use suffering so that it transforms our being and that of those that we come in contact with? How can we stop running from pain and reacting against it in ways that destroy us as well as others? This is a message that people can hear, but they have to hear it a lot, and with great heart, and from people who really care, not from somebody who is just passing through to make a few dollars.

That's why I love the lojong teachings, because the lojong slogans are accessible. Basically, they teach how we can take difficult circumstances and transform them into the path of compassion. That's the kind of teaching we need these days, that difficult circumstances can be the path to liberation. That's news you can use.

bell hooks: Well, that brings me to my final issue. I have written it in big block letters: DON'T EVEN THINK FOR A MOMENT THAT YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DIE.

Pema Chödrön: Right. "Don't even think for a moment that you're not going to die." Dzongsar Khyenste Rinpoche said that to a friend of mine who had cancer and was close to death and was having trouble accepting it. And instead of it coming across to her as cruel, it came across as immense kindness, that someone was telling her the truth.

bell hooks: It does seem that so much of our longing to escape has to do with the sense that the closer I am to suffering, the closer I am to death. 

Pema Chödrön: For me the spiritual path has always been learning how to die. That involves not just death at the end of this particular life, but all the falling apart that happens continually. The fear of death—which is also the fear of groundlessness, of insecurity, of not having it all together—seems to be the most fundamental thing that we have to work with. Because these endings happen all the time! Things are always ending and arising and ending. But we are strangely conditioned to feel that we're supposed to experience just the birth part and not the death part.

We have so much fear of not being in control, of not being able to hold on to things. Yet the true nature of things is that you're never in control. You're never in control. You can never hold on to anything. That's the nature of how things are. But it's almost like it's in the genes of being born human that you can't accept that. You can buy it intellectually, but moment to moment it brings up a lot of panic and fear. So my own path has been training to relax with groundlessness and the panic that accompanies it. Training to allow all that to be there, training to die continually. That seems to be the essence of the lojong teachings—to stay in the space of uncertainty without trying to reconstruct a reference point.

We can stop looking for some idealized moment when everything is simple and secure. This second of experience, which could be painful or pleasurable, is our working basis. What makes all the difference is how we relate to it.

bell hooks: Pema, I want to say how much I have wanted to speak with you, and I thank you for giving me this opportunity. 

Cultivating Openness When Things Fall Apart, bell hooks, Shambhala Sun, March 1997.